Cruel Comments

By Mary Ann Senatore-Your Friend with You on Your Weightloss Journey

Recently, I was waiting for a friend of mine to meet me. I had arrived a few minutes early. A very nice looking gentleman walked over to where I was and was on his cell phone talking with the use of a Bluetooth. At first he looked like we all do when we use them, as if he was talking to himself and soon I realized he was telling his friend whom he was meeting that he had arrived at TGI Friday’s.

A young girl walked toward the entrance. This young girl was in her twenties, wearing shorts that were very tight, and her appearance was sloppy. This young woman was overweight, thighs rubbing, stomach rolls showing, and her butt crack was showing.

Friend, I will be honest, I felt sorry for this young lady, but what happened next shocked me. The gentleman was clearly having a business conversation. He stopped his business conversation and said that he “Has just seen the reason why fat people should be shot.” He went on to describe the young lady that had just walked by and added the comment that “she had enough blubber on her that a whale would be jealous.”

By his appearance and from the conversation that I could hear, my first impression was that this was an educated business man. Once he interrupted his business conversation to make this terrible comment, that impression quickly changed to one of jerk, pinhead, and even mean.

He knew nothing about this young lady, but was quick to make hurtful, mean, and insensitive comments. I know there are those that might say that she “deserved” it because she dressed that way. What pressure is there on young people to dress like everyone else?

Young people are all about fitting in. The fact that she would wear a pair of shorts like that indicates that she either doesn’t care about her appearance, or that she simply wants to fit in. Either way, did she deserve those comments? For him, once he made the blubber comment, I turned me head in his direction and just gave him a rather disapproving look. He quickly changed his conversation back to one of business.

My friend called to give me an update on her location and the person he was meeting showed up. The irony was that the young lady in the shorts was actually a TGI Friday’s waitress. Clearly she changed for work when she arrived and she was wearing the “standard” Friday’s attire. She looked like every other Friday’s staff members and her service was excellent. She just happened to be the waitress that my friend and I had. Her smile was friendly, her attitude was inviting, and her meal suggestion was an excellent choice.

Friends, what do you think? Were his comments cruel and out of line? What would you have done under the same circumstances? I must admit that I do have the nagging feeling that I cannot let go of that I should have said something to him.

On the other hand, this young lady, although an excellent waitress was overweight. She did comment about going to school. She actually is interested in a CSI career and has another year of school left, so there’s ambition, purpose and direction in her goal. Working in Friday’s must be very tempting as far as the food is concerned, and with the schedule demands of work and school, I can relate to dieting not being easy.

The path to weight loss is not an easy one. It takes determination and focus. Right now, for this young lady, to take on losing weight and school, while working is a tremendous task. Am I making excuses for her? Not at all!

I agree, it isn’t easy. I wondered how she would have felt if she knew of the comments that were made about her just before she got to work.

Friends, we can all make a list of reasons why weight loss is difficult or why we cannot do it right now, but the longer we put it off, the harder it becomes. Remember each journey begins with a first step. Let me take the journey with you.

In March, we are going to talk about how we can turn our favorite foods in healthy and low fat recipes.

See you soon,

Mary Ann